The Stepford Wives

"Oh, I feel like Nancy Drew in the mystery of the mid-life crisis."

"I asked myself, "Where would people never notice a town full of robots?" [gasps] Connecticut."

"Today, we are going to discuss - well, it is probably the most important book any of us will ever read. Yes, it is provocative. But it is also inspiring: The Heritage Hills Special Edition Golden Deluxe Treasury of Christmas Keepsakes and Collectibles! [wives and Roger squeal and applaud with delight] This book said to me, "Let's celebrate the birth of our lord Jesus Christ... with yarn"."

"Stepford Wife: I'm going to use a pinecone as the baby Jesus this year."

"Bobbi: And I'm going to attach a pinecone to my vibrator and have a really Merry Christmas!"

"Bobbi: Mace Windu and Amidala."

"Mike: My real name isn't Mike, it's just a nickname from where I used to work."

"Joanna: Is that why the women are so slow?"