Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

"Ace Ventura: Yes, Satan? [He turns around to face Mr. Shickadance.] Oh, I'm sorry sir, you sounded like someone else."

"Mr. Shickadance: Never mind the wisecracks, Ventura. [Coughs loudly] You owe me, rent!"

"Ace Ventura: Mr. Shickadance, I told you. You're my first priority. I'm on a very big case right now. [Shows Mr. Shickadance, a $25,000 reward poster] Look at that. That's a true albino pigeon. Some rich guy lost it and is offering a huge reward. As soon as I find this bird, you're paid."

"Mr. Shickadance: I heard animals in there, Ventura. I heard them again this morning, scratching around."

"Ace Ventura: I never bring my work home with me, sir."

"Mr. Shickadance: Oh yeah! What's all this pet food for?"

"Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. Now how you gonna solve that one?"

"Ace Ventura: Good question, Aguado. First, I'd establish a motive. In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's dick and became insanely jealous. Then I'd lose 30 pounds...porking his wife!"